Judge Slade: According to the provisions of the statutes of our territorial commonwealth, you gentleman of the jury have been selected as representative citizens of our fair community. We want to see that the public's faith is justified. So when you boys retire to consider a verdict, stay out awhile. Mr. Kent will see that you are plentifuly provided with liquid refreshments. And after you have deliberated sufficiently, weighed all the evidence fair and square, and brought in a verdict of not guilty, you will be amply rewarded. You understand?
--Destry Rides Again (1939)
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I did my civic duty today. Assuming that "civic duty" can be defined as "reading 300 pages of Lonesome Dove."
Today was my day for jury duty, my first ever. As noted some time ago, the last couple of times I got called, I'd just moved out of the jurisdiction that had called me, so I was ineligible to participate.
I parked in a small garage on Gay Street a little after 8:00 and walked to the courthouse, whose entrance is on St. Paul. Look for the statue of Cecil Calvert out front and the netting all over the building to discourage pigeons.
When I got there, there was a line of people waiting to get in. They were taking stuff out of their pockets and walking through the metal detector. As I passed through (and it didn't pick up the pen I'd forgotten to take out of my shirt pocket), I must have looked clearly unable to figure out where to go, so one of the guards directed me around the corner to the Jury Assembly Room. We were asked to find a seat. There were none on that level, so I followed some people up a staircase at the end of the room, where another room full of chairs awaited. In this room there were a few television monitors as well. I took a seat that was out of line-of-sight to the monitors and opened my book. After awhile they called us down in groups based on our juror numbers, about 150 at a time. GF told me last night that they get maybe 10-15 out of every hundred they call, and this looked about right. At this point we got checked in at a table (where a clerk gave me a bookmark), then moved to a counter and signed a big printout, after which we were given our $15 jury duty payment. Cash, baby! We're putting CHEESE on the burgers tonight!
Back to our seats. The one I'd vacated was still empty, so I reclaimed it.
At about 11:00, the first group was called out. They wanted Jurors numbered 1-206 or some oddball number like that. They had to leave the building and go to the one next door, where the post office is located. About ten minutes later, it was 207 through 350. Since I was number 345, that meant me. We had to go to the next building as well.
We were basically herded all the way to the next building, through another detector (for which we weren't asked to remove anything; we all just blew through and nobody challenged the alarm) and into an elevator. Up to the fifth floor and into the courtroom of Judge Joseph H. H. Kaplan.
As an aside, "Judge Joseph H. H. Kaplan" would be a great name for Chuck Barris to say on The Gong Show. Don't you think? (You have to have seen the show to get this, I think.)
There were about thirty of us in the room. We were sworn in and Judge Kaplan asked some generic questions of the group. Was anyone a lawyer or paralegal? Does anyone have a problem with someone seeking damages based on another person's negligence? Does anyone know the defendant or the plaintiff? and so on. A few people responded in the affirmative to these questions. Every time they did, they were expected to step forward and talk to the judge and the attorneys. When they did so, Judge Kaplan shut off his mike so the conversation couldn't be heard. What this also did was fill the room with white noise from the speakers to further mask the chat up front. Kind of a neat idea, actually.
After nearly an hour of this, the lawyers had chosen their jurors. Six people had been selected, and one alternate. I wasn't one of them. Since it was close to lunchtime, we were dismissed for lunch and told to return to the Assembly room at 1:45.
I had to look it up later on, but I was pretty sure that I'd heard Judge Kaplan's name before. As it happens, he's been involved in cases involving Baltimore City Schools. I kind of wonder if this would have disqualified me.
I went down to the harbor and walked around a bit, then got some lunch and sat, eating and reading my book. My lunch cost six dollars and change. After awhile I headed back to the courthouse. As I passed the McDonald's on Calvert Street a guy asked me for change. I didn't quite hear him, so I asked him to repeat himself. When he asked again for change, I asked him what day it was. He said to me, "What day is it? It's Wednesday." I pulled the change from lunch out of my pocket and thanked him for his service. I figured this way he'd somehow earned the seventy-odd cents that was in my pocket. Was that obnoxious? I'm not sure. And now I didn't have to worry about taking it out when I went back through the metal detector.
Turns out, I didn't have to worry about that after all; they weren't screening people coming into the building. I was waved directly in. So...homicidal maniacs only come in the building first thing in the morning? Cool.
Then it was back to the Jury Assembly room to wait some more. At 3:30, a half-hour early, we were thanked for our service "for the year" and sent on our merry way. So...let's see. Parking was $8.00, lunch was $6 and change, the rest of the change went to the panhandler. That makes me and the city exactly even for a paid day off where I was required to do nothing more than read my book.
Thus endeth the civics lesson.
Not a bad day, it sounds. That's exactly why I like having jury duty, too, having - "a paid day off where I was required to do nothing more than read my book." I actually hope I get called again soon, so I can get a paid day off to do my schoolwork.
Posted by: danielle | July 27, 2007 at 12:59 PM